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নারীদের প্রতি পুরুষের আকর্ষণ থাকাটাই স্বাভাবিক। আর এমনই আকর্ষন থেকেই প্রেম করেছিলেন হয়তো নিজের পরিচিত একটি মেয়ের সাথে।
প্রথম প্রথম বেশ ভালোই যাচ্ছিলো সময়গুলো। কিন্তু কিছুদিন যেতে না যেতেই আপনি বুঝতে পারলেন যে আপনি যার সাথে সম্পর্ক করেছেন তার লোভ অতিরিক্ত বেশি। কারণে অকারণে আপনার পকেট খালি করে দিয়ে আনন্দ পায় সে।
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দামী দামী উপহারও চেয়ে নেয়। শুধু তাই নয়, নিয়মিত আপনার কাছ থেকে টাকাও নেয়। আপনি নিজেই চলতে পারছেন না যেখানে, সেখানে প্রেমিকার এতো দামী দামী জিনিস কিনে দেয়ার ক্ষমতা কোথায়?
এমন সমস্যায় অনেকেই পড়েন। শুধু লোভ নয়, অতিরিক্ত স্মার্ট, স্বল্প বসনা, চাপা স্বভাব কিংবা অপদার্থ সঙ্গিনীর পাল্লায় পড়ে জীবনের সুখ শান্তি অনেকেরই নষ্ট হতে বসেছে।
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জীবনের সুখ শান্তি যেন নষ্ট না হয় সেজন্য প্রত্যেক পুরুষেরই উচিত ৫ ধরণের নারীদের এড়িয়ে চলা। আসুন জেনে নেয়া যাক কেমন নারীদেরকে এড়িয়ে চলা উচিত।
১) অর্থ সম্পদের লোভে অন্ধ নারী : আপনার কপালে লোভী নারী জুটেছে মানে আপনার পকেটের ভবিষ্যত অন্ধকার। কারণে অকারণে আপনার পকেট খসানোই তার কাজ। আর আপনার পকেটের প্রতি যার মায়া নেই সে আপনাকে ভালোবাসে কিনা তারও কোনো নিশ্চয়তা নেই।
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কোথাও গেলেই এই ধরণের নারীরা সবচেয়ে দামী খাবারটি পছন্দ করবে কিংবা সবচেয়ে দামী পোশাকটি কিনতে চাইবে। তার কাছে কোনো কিছুর গুনাগুণের চাইতে দামটাই মুখ্য হবে। অর্থাৎ ‘বেশি দামী মানেই ভালো জিনিস’ এমন ধারণায় বিশ্বাসী হবে সে। এধরণের নারীদের থেকে যত দূরে থাকা যায় ততই আপনার পকেটের জন্য মঙ্গল।
একটা ব্যাপার সর্বদা মনে রাখবেন, যিনি আপনাকে সত্যি ভালোবাসবেন তিনি কখনই আপনার পকেটের স্বাস্থ্য নিয়ে মাথা ঘামাবেন না কিংবা আপনার কষ্টে উপার্জিত অর্থ অপচয় করতে চাইবেন না।
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একজন লোভী প্রেমিকা বা স্ত্রী একাই আপনার জীবনটাকে তছনছ করে দেয়ার জন্য যথেষ্ট। আপনার অর্থে আয়েশ করাই যার লক্ষ্য, এমন নারী থেকে দূরে থাকুন।
২) অতিরিক্ত স্মার্ট ও অহংকারী : স্মার্ট সঙ্গিনী তো সবাই চায়। কিন্তু অতিরিক্ত স্মার্ট নারীদের সাথে মিশতে কিছুটা সাবধানতা অবলম্বন করা উচিত। খুব বেশি স্মার্ট ধ্যান ধারনার নারীর সাথে আপনার মনের মিল হওয়ার সম্ভাবনা কম থাকে।
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তাছাড়া প্রয়োজনের চাইতে বেশি স্মার্ট সঙ্গিনীর সাথে পরিচিত মহলে চলা ফেরা করতেও অস্বস্তিবোধ হতে আপনার। অতিরিক্ত স্মার্ট মানুষের অহংকার সর্বদাই বেশি হয়ে থাকে। আর এ ধরনের মানুষকে কেউই পছন্দ করেন না।
৩) পরনির্ভরশীল নারী : খুব বেশি কমনীয় নারীদের সাথে অল্প সময় কাটানো গেলেও পুরো জীবন পার করা বেশ সমস্যাই বটে।
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অল্প একটু হেঁটেই আর হাঁটতে চান না, অল্পক্ষণ দাড়ালেই ক্লান্ত হয়ে যান, সব কাজই আরেকজনকে করে দিতে হয়, সামান্য কিছুতেই ভেঙ্গে পড়েন… এমন শরণের নারীরা তাঁদের পুরুষ সঙ্গীদের জন্য বেশ ভালোই বিরক্তিকর।
সামান্য কিছুতেই এ ধরনের নারীরা খুব বেশি কষ্ট পেয়ে যান এবং অনেক রকমের অঘটন ঘটিয়ে ফেলে। তাছাড়া অতিরিক্ত পরনির্ভশীলতার কারণে নানান রকম সমস্যাও সৃষ্টি করে এ ধরণের নারীরা।
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একটা ব্যাপার ভেবে দেখুন, যে মানুষটি নিজেই নিজের দায়িত্ব নিতে পারেন না, তিনি কি করে নিজের সংসার বা সন্তানদের দায়িত্ব নিবেন? দাম্পত্য হচ্ছে দুজনে হাত ধরে পাশপাশি চলা। যিনি আপনার পাশে তো চলতে পারবেনই না, উল্টো আপনাকে পেছনে টেনে ধরে পিছিয়ে দেবেন, এমন নারী হতে দূরে থাকাই মঙ্গল।
৪) স্বল্প বসনা নারী : খুব কম পুরুষই নিজের প্রেমিকা কিংবা স্ত্রীকে স্বল্প বসনে দেখতে পছন্দ করেন। তাছাড়া যেই পোশাকটি ১৩/১৪ বছর বয়সে মানায় তা যদি কেউ ৩০ বছর বয়সে পরে তাহলে খুবই বেমানান লাগে।
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তাছাড়া স্বল্প বসনা নারীদেরকে নিয়ে সমাজে চলাফেরা করা করা কিংবা পরিবারের সাথে পরিচয় করিয়ে দেয়াটাও বেশ অস্বস্তিকর। দেখতে অ’শ্লী’ল দেখায় বলে মানুষের অনেক কটুক্তিও শুনতে হয় সবসময়।
এদের কাউকে কাউকে হয়তো বুঝিয়ে শুনিয়ে বা জোর করে শালীন পোশাক পরানো গেলেও অধিকাংশ ক্ষেত্রেই তাদেরকে মন থেকে পরিবর্তন করা যায় না।
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যে মানুষটি নিজের ব্যক্তিত্বের সাথে মিলিয়ে পোশাক পরতে আগ্রহী নন কিংবা অনর্থক শরীরের প্রদর্শন করতে যার কাছে ভালো লাগে,এমন নারীদের প্রেমিকা হিসাবে ভালো লাগলেও স্ত্রী হিসাবে তাদেরকে নিয়ে সুখী হওয়া যায় না। তাই জীবনে সুখী হতে চাইলে এ ধরনের নারীদের সাথে সম্পর্ক এড়িয়ে চলাই ভালো।
৫) অতিরিক্ত গম্ভীর নারী : পেটে বো”মা মারলেও যাদের মুখ থেকে কথা বের হয় না এ ধরণের নারীদের থেকে দূরত্ব বজায় রাখাই ভালো। প্রথমত এ ধরণের নারীদের সঙ্গ কিছুদিন পরেই বেশ একঘেয়ে লাগে। দ্বিতীয়ত, এধরণের নারীরা খুবই চাপা স্বভাবের হয়।
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চাপা স্বভাবের নারীরা মনের ভেতরে সব ক্ষো”ভ লুকিয়ে রাখে এবং সেগুলোর প্রভাব সম্পর্কে পরে। আর সম্পর্ক মানেই তো দুজনে ভাব বিনিময় করা। একজন নির্বাক মানুষের সাথে কত টুকুই বা ভাব বিনিময় করতে পারবেন আপনি? তাই আপনি যদি সহজ, হাসিখুশি একটি জীবন চান তাহলে খুব বেশি গম্ভীর নারীদেরকে এড়িয়ে চলুন।
৬) যৌ’ন সম্পর্ককে ভালোবাসার চাইতে বেশী গুরুত্ব দেন : নারীরা যখন যৌ”ন”তা”র বিষয়ে অধিক আগ্রহী হয়, সেটা যে কোন পুরুষ পছন্দ করেন খুব। তাদের মাথায় একবারও এটা আসে না যে ভালোবাসার চাইতে যৌ”ন”তা”য় অধিক আগ্রহী নারী আসলেই তাঁকে ভালোবাসেন কিনা!
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যৌ”ন আকাঙ্ক্ষা জীবনে থাকবেই আর সেটাই ভালোবাসাকে মধুর করে তোলে। কিন্তু আপনার সঙ্গিনী যখন ভালোবাসার চাইতে যৌ”ন”তা”কে”ই বেশী প্রাধান্য দেবেন, জানবেন যে আপনার সাথে প্র’তা’র’ণা করতে সময় লাগবে না তার!
৭) তুলনা করা : নিজের বাবা, ভাই, দুলাভাই কিংবা বন্ধুদের সাথে আপনাকে তুলনা করা নারীকে ভুলেও সঙ্গিনী করতে যাবেন না। জীবনটা কেটে যাবে বাক্যবাণে অপমানিত হতে হতে!
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৮) সংসার করতে আগ্রহী নন : কেবল বিয়ে করলেই হবে না, সংসারে আগ্রহীও হতে হবে। যে যাই বলুক না কেন, নারীরা আজও “হোমমেকার”। একজন নারীর ওপরে ভিত্তি করে দাঁড়িয়ে তাহকে পুরো পরিবার। তাই যে নারী সংসার করার ব্যাপারে আগ্রহী নন, তার থেকে দূরে থাকুন।
এখানে উল্লেখ্য যে, কর্মজীবী হওয়ার সাথে সংসারী হওয়ার কোন সম্পর্ক নেই। প্রচুর কর্মজীবী নারী দারুণ সংসারী। আবার অসংখ্য গৃহবধূও আদতে সংসারী নন। মানুষকে সম্মান করতে জানে না